As adults we sometimes assume we know what is going on in the life of others. Let’s face it, we don’t.
A baby can’t tell what is going on. It is crying and we can just guess what is wrong and try to mitigate: is it hungry, does it have a stomach, toothing or some big business in the diapers? As adults can talk, we sometimes wrongly assume that we know. However, when we ask someone “How are you?” we mostly hear the usual “good”. No-one wants to talk about their challenges right away and it usually takes some serious digging to find out.
The most obvious assumptions about others are taken in car traffic. If someone is driving too slow or too agressive I am quick to assume that the person behind the wheel must be a very stupid or strange person. In reality however we do not have the smallest hint of what is going on with that person. They could have a baby in their car that is hurt and rush to the hospital, their navigation system might have broken down or they just got the news that their best friend died and are highly distracted. We do not know and thus should not judge them.
A friend of mine who is driving her car a lot, told me recently how she decided to positively handle the frequent aggressions that she faces in traffic. She decided to send a couple of air kisses to the other drivers when there is an aggressive situation. Reportedly, the other drivers are perplex. I guess this never happened to them before. I think this is an excellent idea. Let’s not immediately judge others. Let’s take a step back and assume they are great people but have a good reason for their sometimes seemingly strange behavior. And then let’s send them some air kisses, no matter how strange they drive or even if they honk at us. If they cannot see us, go ahead and send some “mind kisses” and wish them all the best.
A cheerful heart is good medicineProverbs 17:22
Instead of assuming, I started to ask more active questions to find out what is going on with others. If I cannot ask questions like in traffic, I send air or mind kisses. It works well for me, and I hope it also helps you to stay positive in these turbulent times.
Take care and trust that all will turn to the best, Adi